Tuesday, November 27, 2007

future thoughts and a depressing denument

68 Thingies! from martha

1. Single or Taken - Single
2. Zodiac sign - pices
3. Birthday - march 3rd
4. Male or Female - fem ale
5. Preschool- some church basement i think
6. Elementary - rutherford
7. Middle - negative does not compute
8. High School -Dover
9. Eye color- grey blue
10. Hair color - brown... but spicey red
Are you a health freak? ahahahahahhah no.
12. Height - 5'4" :)
13. Do you love someone - yes indeed
14. Is that someone in your school - yes
15. Piercings you have - ear lobes and a rook
16. Righty or lefty - righty

FIRSTS :
17. First piercing- my ears
18. First sport - fastball
19. First pet - misty my grey kitty
20. First vacation - does camping count ?
21. First crush - my first hard core crush was levi in grade 5
22. First love - james
23. First boyfriend/girlfriend- well there was shane.... but i'm gonna have to say james

CURRENTLY :
24. Eating - nothing
25. Drinking- apple juice box
26. Listening to - nothing
27. Wanting to see/speak to - josh and kyle or spencer

YOUR FUTURE:
28. Want kids - yes
29. Want to get married - Yes, eventually...
30. Job - an artist
31. Where will you live - anywhere

WHICH IS BETTER WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX?
32. Lips or eyes- Eyes.
33. Looks or personality- Personality, when you like someone for who they are they become more attractive to you anyways
34. Athletic or lazy - i don't think those two work as a contrast...
35. Intelligence or attraction? Attraction i guess but i think its hot when a guy knows alot about something.. but isn't pompus about telling you
36. Romantic or spontaneous- both
37. Body or mind?-mind
38. Tall or short- Tall and skinny
39. Shy or outgoing- outgoing.
40. Older or Younger? - doesn't matter

HAVE YOU EVER :
41. Kissed a stranger- i don;t think so
42. Lost glasses/contacts - yes...*sigh*
43. Ran away from home - noop
44. Broken any bones- my collar bone
45. Broken someone's heart - yes
46. Been arrested- Negative
47. Cried when someone died - yes
48. Liked a friend - yea
49. Been cheated on - not to my knowledge
50. Seen porn- gay for pay!
51. Snuck out - no ,
52. Been called a slut- not to my face, so i dunno
53. Got in a fist fight - no, but i think it would be fun
54. Shoplifted- kinda

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
55. Yourself - most of the time, sometimes i'm not so sure
56. Miracles- not really
57. Love at first sight - no
58. Santa Claus - nope.
59. sex on the first date - i don;t think so ..
60. Kissing on the first date - yea
61. Angels - no
62. God - not specifically,
63. Gay Marriage - yea
64. Abortion - a womans body is her own
65. Barack Obama - i feel dumb cuz i don't know who this is

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY : (isnt that what I've been doing?)
66. Is there anyone you would really like to be with right now? yes.
67. Have you really liked someone that you shouldn't have? hahaha yes
68. Have more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time? Negative

thats was a nice warm up, i like surveys, but you cant do the all the time cuz it;s just the same questions over again. they are fun because sometimes you get to say things about your life where you would not normally get to say. i dunno.
it was weird today. i was at work and it randomly occured to me that one day, someone is going to want to spend the rest of their life with me. i found that though very assuring. i thought about myself, i am beautiful, pleasant kind, kinda funny, i am talented. ext ext. i am many amiable qualities and one day some one will realize and love all that and stuff... i dunno, i guess i didn;t get that far on the thought train, but whatever it gave me something nice to think about while i was cleaning.. and then i thought what kind of man will i end up with? i have no clue, i really could not think.. i guess thats good though.. too many women have their ideal man and they miss one that might not fit perfectly into their plan... but w.e i dunno
ha ha i did alot of thinking today. and got two things out of the way, what an efficiant day.

anyways i also pondered as i drove, about how unfortunate this has been. the end to what was an amazing exciting thing, was merely a fizzleing out. as my mind likes to see it. no big drama , no passion, just meh, and it's almost as if there was never anything there. except ya know that love i find myself repressing, but it doesn't really matter i don;t think.
i think my biggest uneasyness is that although i do, at the same time i dont understand.. why. not that it matters now anyways.

i am getting quite sleepy, today was an exausting day, as with the next few be as well. next week will be no different. why is it i have been waiting for things to be over, i want somethign to start.
oh well oh well, one day things will be set in a way. i am looking forward to that life. i do not think i am much for this atm. who knows.
i am excited for your visit , i am excited for mine.

1 comment:

Let Go said...

I agree that too many people generally have a specific "type" of person in their mind... I think people need to be open minded and realize that love doesn't care about your "type."
Rylan is vaaaaastly different from most guys I've been interested in, and that's probably a good thing.