i hate...

feeling nothing at all. knowing that if something needs to be done i have to do it because no one else will. high matinance people. giving so much of myself to people and feeling little in return. when my kind gestures go un-noticed. lack of motivation. that i i do not know where i stand with you. being a third wheel. wanting to cry half the time. that you arn;t yourself, or i don;t know who you are. thinking so much. not knowing what i want, or need to feel better. FUCKING TIME. that you are being manipulated. that your the only thing that makes me feel better right now. feeling un attractive. letting my friends down. dirty dishes. being unrational. my responsibilities. that i have not been able to overcome this yet. ranting like this because even if it isn't annoying you yet , it;s sure annoying me. myself and my life at this time...fuck it