Sunday, January 20, 2008

can i be electric too?

blah. it is sunday. work tonight. i should be working on my model of the set. but that means i have to go to the school and get a model of the theatre which i don't particularly want to do. i am very tired, exaused you could say. it feels like i am fighting something. i am not certain of what. it's just like there are a bunch of external forces pushing on me. i don;t know how i manage sometimes. it always seems like there is so much to do. work, theatre work, assignments, applications, set design, printmaking, life. pft. i know i shouldn;t but i want to do nothing today. we will see.

looking back. thursday hung out with tasia. hehe yay james macavoy(spelling) then friday the fucking workers where hammering at fucking 8... they are useless. augh... i'm not going to get into it.. but i hate them. got up cleaned my apartment. went to work. went to eryns and got way to messed up, curse you wine. saturday went to work at the theatre, *sigh* disorganization. thats another thing.. i am going to have to prepair shit so that the silly people renting the theatre get what needs to get done in their next rehearsal, becuase i can;t stay late. i have to go to work directly after. *sigh* then to work. which was horrible. i wasn't feeling particularly well from the previous night. i was very clumsy, and a little creeped out. i had this dream where one of my co workers acted very inappropriately and it basically just freaked me right out. because all the things he normally does, talking to me and making silly comment which i normally think nothing of, just seemed way weird. like offering me beer? " i seem like the kinda girl"wtf is that supposed to mean?! anyways i will be fine. it was just another stress that i don't need though.
apres work i went to visit spencer. he told me of the shenanigans of citt, which i am so jealous and sad that i missed. *cries*

i am not looking forward to this week, but am excited for it to be over. it seems so far away. why can't i just skip all the junk in between. this time i will not forget the bean game. or What?
i want to paint. but i know i will feel guilty about doing it. in fact i feel kinda bad now for not having started anything. i think i just feel crappy actually. sometimes i just want to give up, and forget about all the things i have to do. but i totally know that isn't an option.
"no peace i find, just an old sweet song, keeps georga on my mind."
Bah, sunday

1 comment:

Let Go said...

I so know what you mean about wanting to give up and forget about all the things you have to do... I feel that constantly, especially this year. I'm like, I know I have sooo much stuff I have to do but it's so intimidating that I'm like, I could just not do it and it'll go away. But it doesn't go away... so we do it. And we do it well!
I do hate that feeling of wanting to give up but not being able to though... but, one moment at a time, I guess.