exausted

so i'm just sitting and stuff..it has been a long long weekend. building haunted house... the dumb crucible show..stupid parties where i know no one..it woukld have gottne better if i had stayed when pam and carolyn where there too.. then i lost my cell and freaked out. but io have it back finally. i am emotionally exausted and confused from this morning. watched the ridiculousely long othello with michelle and chris. then came home. got yelled at by my mom becuase my room isn;t clean. i'm sorry i haven't been home in a fucking week. i have another fucking week of the crucible. lots of time to sit and think. this probably won;t be a good week for lisa...
umm on an upside i got to talk to amber a bit and that was fun. i saw uncle joe and he is hillariouse. tomorrow i am hanging out with ashley and chris and michelle and going through the haunted house. i hope it is going well tongiht and i hope i didn;t ruin things for people.

there is no cure for what is killing me

somedays i hate myself..
somedays i hate you
i know there are many days
when you probably hate me too
please remember...
though i'm smiling on the surface
i'm crying deep within
my heart isnt breaking
thats how its always been

i'm still here
(L)